I've learned some pretty neat things over this past 18 weeks of finding joy in my daily life. I realized in this journey that part of why I don't always feel gleeful is because I feel so terribly all of the time. I can't really pinpoint when this happened, but it has been getting progressively worse over the past several years. I know the summer I turned 36, I felt like my health went down hill. I lost my will to do much of anything. I thought it was because of the knee pain I was experiencing. Then my knee surgery didn't really help me feel normal. I've been asking my OB/GYN to test my thyroid for several years and they always test the TSH and tell me I'm normal and send me on my way. I have known that something is not right. I literally have every symptom of hypothyroidism (no energy/stamina, low body temperature, always cold, depression, hair falling out, dry skin, gasping for air, brain fog, weight gain, inability to lose weight...the list goes on). It isn't normal to feel like an old lady at my age. This past winter, my health continued to decline. I had days where I could not even get out of bed. Seriously, I'm not quite 38. I have 3 young children. I homeschool. I can't have days like that. It really isn't okay. So I went to a different MD and told them about my joint pain, stiffness, inability to live a normal life. They ran some blood tests and told me my vitamin D was low. He put me on an antidepressant and told me that I was stiff and had joint pain because I was depressed and gaining weight. He blew off the fact that I've gained a ridiculous amount of weight over the past few years despite eating mostly healthy and not large quantities. I demanded more bloodwork. They ran more tests and discovered that I had a positive ANA, which could mean I have an autoimmune disorder. I have been referred to a specialist to see what is going on with that. Meanwhile, I continued to search because I still knew there was more to it. A friend recommended a NP to me and I saw her in early April. She ran a very comprehensive blood panel. A week later I was in for the results. She confirmed that my vitamin D was low. She also discovered that my hormones are completely out of whack, which I've suspected for years because of my mood swings and crazy menstrual cycles. She discovered I have the MTHFR (C677T/ A1298C) gene mutation and that I have issues with my thyroid that a TSH test will not find. So the very next day I started using bioidentical hormone creams, taking a natural dessicated thyroid supplement, and started taking methylfolate because people with the MTHFR gene mutation cannot handle folic acid. Honestly, the information on MTHFR gene mutations is a little overwhelming and I'm just starting to comprehend it. I'm 32 days into all of these supplements and I feel better than I have in years. Sadly, I still don't feel great all of the time, but I have faith that I will continue to progress because we have finally identified why I was feeling terribly. I know that it won't happen overnight and that there are many pieces to this puzzle. I will follow up with her again this month for bloodwork and we can adjust whatever needs to be adjusted.
This leads me to my next point. I have been wanting to start running again for years. Between a bum knee, a broken foot, crazy menstrual cycles, pain, and quite frankly just feeling like crap, I haven't started. Over this past month, I have more good days than bad. I can count on one hand how many days I've had horrible joint pain. So now's the time. I started my journey to running again. I'm using the Couch to 5 K because that is what works for me. This morning was slow and sweaty. It was hard, but I did it. It is a 3 day a week program. I haven't decided what I will do on my off days, but I'm definitely shooting for 5 days a week of something. I do not actually care if I lose weight. I just want to run. It's always been a dream of mine. I have started this journey several times and this time I want to do it for good. I'm excited to see where this journey takes me (hopefully some cool 5Ks). If you are a runner friend, please encourage me. I actually do not like running with people because I am a loner when I exercise, but I definitely respond to words of affirmation. This is a 12 week program, so by the beginning of August, I will hopefully be able to run a 5 K and not at a snail's pace.
I'm not giving up. I'm determined to feel healthy again and hopefully I'm closer than I've been in a long time.
